Saturday, 13 July 2013

Stieg Larsson, my friend by Kurdo Baksi or ... a postumous praise ...

For some unknown reason I decided to interrupt the reading of a book I had been "struggling" with for the last two weeks to start reading "Stieg Larsson, my friend", which I have just finished.

Despite the controversial opinions, particularly related to the author of this book and the "disputable" degree of friendship regarding the character he decided to write about, I must say I liked reading it, namely because it made me ponder on quite a few things associated with the mourning or even "farewell" process one has to go through when someone dear to us "parts".

"Farewell is a hard word to define. Who is saying farewell to whom? The one who leaves or the one who stays behind? I keep coming back to that question over and over again."

"There is a time to weep and a time to maintain a stiff upper lip and do whatever needs to be done."

"Mourning involves being haunted by images that take possession of you when you least expect it. It is often impossible to understand why you remember things in such detail, almost as if you were in the same place at the time they happened. You see everything so clearly, inhale the smells and hear the voices. How you manage to fit together these fragments of memory is probably the basis for mourning. It is a healing process."

But then there was also the outstanding character who is being remembered for what he stood for and the way he chose to live his rather short life.

" A man can achieve a lot if he is passionate about a cause."

" (...) more important to him was the possibility of making a difference without being noticed."

" (...) I think the only answer that holds water is that he was a combination of the people who influenced his life. (...) but there was also an element of escapism. He was always aware of the need to keep pushing at the boundaries (...) he needed to keep on pressing on. New goals, new challenges."

I couldn't help being drawn to the similarities between Stieg's approach to life and the one my own daughter had until her untimely death. Dedicated to a similar cause, (though specifically in the area of women victims of domestic violence) she seemed to have also developed a posture that very much resembles the one Stieg had throughout his own life, despite the fact that her recognition has only been circumscribed to those she directly influenced.

Upon having been prompted the following questions Stieg's responses may ultimately provide us with one of life's great wishes ...

"Did you get what you wanted from this life?
And what did you want?
To be loved."

Definitely worth reading. 

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